Big Bear Bummers

Address: 491 Imperial Ave, Sugarloaf, CA 92386

Link: https://www.redfin.com/CA/Sugarloaf/491-Imperial-Ave-92386/home/3077202

Beds/Baths: 1 bed, 1 bath, 504 squares

Purchase Price (2/2020): $140,000

Asking Price: $224,900

Difference: +$84,900

Commission (3%): -$6,747

Total Gain: +$78,153

These people are out of their freaking minds if they think they’re going to get 60 percent more than their 2020 purchase price. This is pure, unfettered delusion.

For starters, although the kitchen is fine the rest of the place is in pretty rough shape.

Furthermore, I don’t know how I feel about someone asking nearly a quarter million bucks who can’t be arsed to mask off the ceiling before painting.

And, uh, do you mind explaining what’s going on with the bedroom floors and unpainted baseboards?

But at least the floors in the living room are nice, right? Right?

Did you catch it? Yup, the floors are buckling:

Furthermore, several electrical outlets are missing their covers.

Those cost like 49 cents at Ace Hardware. So if they couldn’t be bothered to fix little stuff like that, or buy $7 worth of paint for the baseboards, what are the odds they maintained the big things?

Pretty slim.

Although it’s utterly pointless because there is no fucking way this thing sells anywhere near the current price, here is a financial breakdown for a future buyer:

Purchase price: $224,900
Down payment: $44,980
Monthly nut: $1,491/mo (@7%)

When I calculate these monthly payments I typically use Redfin’s calculator. It’s super basic and should only be considered a ballpark figure. Why? Check out the estimate for insurance:

Uh, yeah.

Not going to happen. It’s probably more like $400 a month once everything settles down from the Palisades and Eaton fires.

My point is, finding someone to willingly pay $2,000 a month payment for this dump is a pipe dream, and that pipe is crammed full of crack rocks.

When all is said and done, these lazy greedheads would be lucky to get the 2018 price of $105,100. Think they’ll let it go for that? Not a chance – it’ll go back to the bank before they ever consider that.

But that’s where we’re headed for tiny, 1-bedroom dumps like this in Sugarloaf.